[spelling bee]
— greg (@GrowlyGrego) April 25, 2014
Your word is "spider"
Can you use it in a sentence?
"A spider has eight eyes."
[kid smiles]
Spider. S-P-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-D-E-R
"There's a sleeping person. Let's go ask it questions." – Children
— yoyoha (@yoyoha) September 8, 2012
****
https://twitter.com/briangaar/status/563714130176397312
Daddy can we go to the park?!
— paperwash© (@PaperWash) September 30, 2014
*looks at 12% battery*
"No"
****
*baby starts screaming*
— ristolable (@ristolable) June 29, 2014
Whoa little guy. Stop right there. You're not born full of rage and hate. You have to earn that shit
before baby: oops I slept in past noon again lol
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) June 2, 2015
after baby: wtf is sleep I will cut a man
****
*eating chips w/ my 3yo* don't eat too many
— dan mentos (@DanMentos) June 16, 2015
"why?"
they're bad for you
"then why did mommy buy them"
*stops chewing* SHE'S TRYING TO KILL US
https://twitter.com/WGladstone/status/414434288990289920
****
Graduation ceremony rules said I couldn't cheer as my daughter crossed the stage, so I did the next best thing and booed all the other kids.
— Tim Siedell (@badbanana) May 24, 2015
4yo: "I'm sorry I spilled your scotch daddy!"
— Cortronic (@cortronic) May 14, 2015
me: "It's ok, son. That's why pencils have erasers."
*grabs pencil, erases kid from existence*
****
Son, can you please clean your room?
— Nigel (@PoguePhilosophy) April 21, 2014
No.
Well, tidy your desk at least.
No.
Pick up the Legos?
No.
He has his mother’s no’s.
https://twitter.com/afbradstone/status/596106437547446273
****
Beyonce?! Oh. Hell. Yeah. That kid is winning at life! 🙂
Some kid had a surprise birthday party today and my son said "IT'S SECRET LIKE BEYONCÉ'S ALBUM!"
— Frank Lowe (@GayAtHomeDad) July 29, 2014
That's my baby.
For sale. Baby clown shoes. Never worn. Kid thinks he's too good for the family business. Can be worn as a size 9 bowling shoe. 50$
— ceej (@ceejoyner) June 1, 2015
****
Before having a kid the most important thing to ask yourself is “Am I ready to watch the exact same cartoon on repeat for the next 4 years?”
— rob fee (@robfee) March 3, 2015
Want to send a 4-year-old boy into a blind rage? Repeatedly tell him he’s wrong and you are positive their names are “Batman and Robert”.
— Jeff (@usedwigs) April 2, 2014
****
When my toddlers ask where mommy is, I explain that she's gone to heaven. That way they're super-excited when she gets back from the gym.
— Dan Ewen Ⓥ (@VaguelyFunnyDan) March 27, 2012
Cookie Monster delivering the eulogy at Bert's funeral. Head bowed low. Stillness. "Me want cookies," he sadly intones. "Me want cookies."
— Dr. Bucky Isotope, Master of Puppets (@BuckyIsotope) March 23, 2013
The Obama Diary 
Good evening, TOD!
Evening Jazz!!!
Congrats jazz!!!! 🙂
“That way they’re super-excited when she gets back from the gym.”
“Anyway sorry your legs don’t work.”
Oh, NW, you are wicked!!!!!! 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀
That was another one when I told myself: ‘DON’T LAUGH’. But I totally did!!
I know, Chips. I was joking it back but couldn’t help just 😀 😀 😀
“choking” not “joking” 😀 😀
🙂
OMG:
When my toddlers ask where mommy is, I explain that she’s gone to heaven. That way they’re super-excited when she gets back from the gym.
😆
Nerdy, they’re hilarious (adored the graduation ceremony one too), thanks a trazillion!!!!!!
You’re welcome. 🙂
LMAO! Good choices, NW!
🙂
hey. just a thought. We’ve been talking a bit about VP Joe and Father’s Day today here in TOD and just in case anyone wanted to send him a note here’s the link to send an email to the whitehouse. You can choose the Vice President. I just left him a note myself.
https://www.whitehouse.gov/contact/submit-questions-and-comments
Ha! Thanks for the laughs NW. This just went by on my timeline that made me chuckle:
Hahaha…… that’s a good one!
Oh myy 😉 Nothing beats the innocent enthusiastic proud little helper showing her Daddy…….. ❤ ❤ ❤
WTG Kiddo 😉
If you have Oprah’s channel called OWN, a feature on President Barack Obama’s My Brother’s Keeper is about to air. It is called Rise: The Promise of My Brother’s Keeper.
Airing today at 7PM EST/6PM CST.
Afternoon / evening, friends.
Busy day at Casa de LL. Missus is replanting tomatoes, because we’re idiots. Took Mother of LL to church, and are being repaid by her making us ropa vieja, black beans and rice, and fried plantains. Oh, and we should have a shitload of tomatoes in about 2 months, so salsa making party at Casa de LL later.
Now that I have some distance from the horror, I hope to have a piece ready for here and TPV on Charleston tomorrow.
*because we’re idiots*
Everything is sounding so funny to me, tonight! And I haven’t even been drinking. 🙂
Sighs. We neglected to punch holes in the planters to drain water.
Figured it was something like that! #WhyINeverGarden
And put some stones in the pot to lightly cover the holes – keeps out slugs, etc, keeps the dirt in the pot and adds a layer of drainage. But I guess it’s too late – three times planting and I’d go to the farmer’s market for tomatoes.
Yum Cuban black beans and rise, fried plantains…..me and some college friends are going to Versaille in Los Angeles next month….
DO NOT GO TO VERSAILLES!! If you want good, authentic Cuban food close to the Versailles on Venice, go to El Rincon Criollo in Culver City.
That Chuck Todd doesn’t understand that it speaks a lot that he and his Meet The Press team created that vile colorblind video before the Charleston Shooting says a lot about he and his crew. It perfectly captures how evil and soulless they are.
They are the type who won’t say the n-word to your face, but will actively work behind the scenes for black people to continue to be disenfranchised.
I also don’t believe for a minute that he discussed use of the video with his staff. Either they decided (as in they must tell him everything to say or do, since he surely has no brain) or he decided and nixed any naysayers smart enough to want him not to use it. A guy like Chuckie will lie to save his own ass.
It is the same Ugly Todd that uses the word OPTICS to opine on every disgusting wicked criticism he has ever uttered about Pres Obama.
I suppose, OPTICS of Epic Failure Never applies to Chuck Todd?
But then again, little, tiny, small minded Todd has a deep seeded complex……Overcompensation…….Yep…..that is it.
You had me at SPIIIIIIIIDER 🙂
I’m still weeping at the Dad booing all the other kids at the graduation ceremony!!!
That was where she got me again. A novel solution 🙂
I’ve been to two 8th grade graduation ceremonies for children of my son’s GF, in recent years. So incredibly boring I cannot even begin to tell you (Ha!). At both, the ringleader said “no cheering for individuals, cheer at the end” and my son and I cheered for all of them individually. We were far enough away from the boring circus ring that they didn’t know where the sound was coming from, and – of course – we weren’t alone. Made the damn ceremonies a lot more entertaining.
Am I bad?
You are a DISGRACE!!!!!!!!!!! 😆
And the apple didn’t fall far from the tree!
I just returned from my grandson’s 8th grade graduation in RI. The ceremony was straight out of Martin Mull’s “The History of White People in America.” The principal was trying to be “cool” and kept ending her shoutouts with “Holla!” About the third time I said “give me a frigging break” wasn’t until those around me started snickering that I realized I said it OUT LOUD, REALLY LOUD! One of the folks told me that the principal fancied herself to look and sound like one of the Real Housewives of NYC. Fortunately, my grandson is not easily embarrassed… LOL. And yes, I cheered when they called his name.
BTW, for those not familiar, Martin Mull’s “The History of White People in America” was an HBO mockumentary done back in the 80’s…
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089277/
HYSTERICAL. (Guilty pleasure: I actually know the exact NYC Real Housewife she’s trying to emulate. Ha.)
You came from seeing “The History of White People in America” … the two aforementioned graduation ceremonies I attended were at a small school in a rural area of Central Illinois, where I live now. My son and I are from Central New Jersey. We’re sitting in the gym where they held the graduation, the first time I attended, and I noticed a banner on the wall. The name of their team was the “Farmers.” OMG. Nothing against farmers, but in a New Jersey city, you call somebody a farmer, and it’s an insult! My son and I were beside ourselves snickering. Not good role models, for sure.
Holla!
The things we do for grandkids… As soon as I recover, I’ll give you guys a laugh about my week last week — the week from hell — all “1st world” problems. It helps to live by the motto “Semper Gumby!” LOL…
Been hit or miss here since Wednesday afternoon, have booked time this evening to catch up… Just want to say thanks to Chips, Nerdy and all for the creating/maintaining this oasis to come back to…
WELL…I SIGNED UP AGAIN ON TWITTER AND TOO FUNNY..I FORGOT HOW TO USE IT AND SOMEHOW I ENDED UP WITH THE DENVER BRONCOS…I’M ON THE FLOOR…HAVE A GOOD NIGHT EVERYONE…NOT GOING TO ATTEMPT TO UNTANGLE THE TWITTER MESS TILL TOMORROW…HOPE FOR PEACE…OUT!
Chips, please consider this article for a front page…
This is a ‘must read’ letter, for sure, Alycee!! TY!!
“To you, beloved Americans, I offer this humble suggestion: please learn something from South Africa’s history in the current crisis? Read Alan Paton’s Cry, The Beloved Country. Read Nelson Mandela’s Long Walk to Freedom. Consider Desmond Tutu’s words and example. Read Michael Cassidy. Read about the Truth and Reconciliation Commission. Listen to what happened (and how the church responded) when a group of terrorists walked into St James Church and massacred the worshippers there in 1993.”
#TruthAndReconciliation
This just reconfirms my assignment of Cry, the Beloved Country every semester for my college freshmen. This book speaks to today in Charleston, Oklahoma City, Ferguson…….I know I’ve spoken about it before, it is a powerful book.
Now I will read the entire letter! Thank you Bob.
Thank you, Carolyn!
A thoughtful Letter.
Thank you for sharing it here.
WOW, Alycee!!! You’re on a roll!!!!
I disagree with his assessment of President Obama, totally, but this, as hard as it is to read, must be stated over and over and over again:
“That is why the judge presiding over the bond hearing saw fit to privilege the feelings of the perpetrator’s family above the experiences of the black families in the room. In every discussion of racial injustice – whether in South Africa or the United States – the first consideration is to white feelings. South Africa is in the midst of a national debate about affirmative action. My own university, the University of Cape Town, did away with race-based affirmative action on the grounds that qualified white students were being excluded in favor of unqualified black students. The mobilization of sympathy for these ‘poor’ white kids is blind to the structural exclusion of black kids by not only the admissions process but by a culture that says these institutions properly belong to Whites. White supremacy reproduces itself by a combination of entitlement to privilege and forgiveness, and an entitlement to black lives as whites present themselves as victims of reverse racism.
I am told by those who know better that forgiveness is liberating to the persons involved. I don’t question that. I just worry that this expectation of instant forgiveness reproduces racism in the white community, and a denialist salve over the wound in the black community. But does the wound ever really heal because we forgive, because we tell ourselves we have forgiven? I am not so sure. In South Africa the results have been a combination of racist denial on the part of the whites and intense anger among young black South Africans.”
I still want to cry when I see stuff like this!!!!!!!!! Such a beautiful man.
He’s dedicated to this with every fiber of his soul. A great and beautiful man.
Thank you, thank you, thank you, President Barack Obama.
Seriously …….
#MyBrothersKeeper
h/t Chips ….
I try to be a nice person, but when it comes to people like Chuck Todd, oh, well.
and such a lovely daughter! but knowing she has secret service with her should help 🙂
You know Susanne, I’d guess PBO sent the entire US military to that prom! 🙂
i can only imagine what it’s like for those girls, dating with surveillance. 🙂
Can you imagine how restrained everyone at the prom must have been to ensure not a single photo or video of Ms Malia O did not emerge!!!
LOL 🙂 well I’m sure they had way of monitoring cell phones if they allowed them at all.
🙂
I’m a little bit like POTUS in that I SO WANT TO KNOW WHO MALIA TOOK TO THE PROM.
I know, I know.
Of course, I don’t really want either of them. I want a truthful independent journalist aka news person. But obviously they can never actually fire these two, they must both have something on Phil Griffin, so …
i liked this article, but almost didn’t read it because of the huge headline– ‘ it’s a fog: how the white house responds to a massacre ‘– and odd photo of the president. am i the only one who thought they were saying pbo is in a fog when handling these issues?
You can be certain that #WhiteSurpremacists like Chuckles Todd, the folk at Fox News, CNN ….. will never give broadcast time to this ….
Oh my goodness.
Impressive, Jacqueline!
Wish I were there.
Me too. If we lived within 200 miles we would have been there, for certain.
Lots of folks from out of town, according to the news folks.
Watching this livestream is really moving. Hands across Charleston. Hands across America!
One of the recurring themes on the few placards I’ve spotted:
LOVE THY NEIGHBOR
And
WHITE SILENCE =
WHITE CONSENT
YUP!!
People are “getting” it. White people. I’m afraid to dream it’ll continue.
Can’t guarantee it’ll continue, Jacqueline. I can guarantee that this white person is on a mission to be sure it does.
I’m tagging along with you, Bob.
It would be great if out of this tragedy…. this time…. *at last* there comes the meaningful action we had hoped to see after Sandy Hook!
Could not agree with you more, oh ‘quiet one’!
I don’t like to kid myself, but I’ve got that hope. If the meaningful action would take over just one state, that would be a start.
Joining our hopes together, JO’ – it has got to be ignited somewhere ….. in an extremely motivated ‘grassroots’.
Wow.
The crowd is Huge.
Fantastic!
Probably too many to be on that bridge at the same time (hope not!). It’s just a beautiful groundswell of people.
That’s a major bridge, Jacqueline. I’ve driven on it, loaded with tractor trailers and cars moving in both directions. I think they’re safe.
Whew. Good!
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/06/21/meet-the-press-gun-violence-video_n_7632814.html
Meet the press in hot water it looks like.
I thought this Bruce Springsteen song is so evocative of the power of the Charleston Nine: “May your hope give us hope. May your faith give us faith. May your strength give us strength. May your love bring us love.”
So funny, VC …. not so much the photo, which is clever, but that when I first saw it I thought your BFF amk had posted it 😀 😀
/with indignation/ Whatchamean, Bfr?? You implying that unowho2 influences me?? What a thought!
😀 😀
Nevah …. 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀
Good answer! 😉
😉
We won’t even go into “How the great grandmother sees it!!!!!!” I’ve become a protective lioness. Ha.
😀 😀 Out of the picture entirely, I’m sure!
For sure!
😀 😀
wimminz/smh
They’re going to end with a 9-minute moment of silence. Tears.
#TruthAndReconciliation
#3rdReconstruction
Departing Palms Springs.
Denise Goolsby/The Desert Sun
I wondered if he’d be there … and he is.
He was in his Mom’s belly in 1963 during the Washington DC March. His Mom drove there by herself.
Stephen Colbert is one Fine Humanist.
He shows up, speaks up and he puts his Money when needed.
That he does! I greatly admire him, too!
New post
http://theobamadiary.com/2015/06/21/remembering-rev-pinckney-and-rev-simmons/
Subject: Remove the Confederate Flag From All Government Places
Hi,
Symbols of hate have no place in our government.
The Confederate flag is not a symbol of southern pride but rather a symbol of rebellion and racism. On the heels of the brutal killing of nine Black people in a South Carolina church by a racist terrorist, it’s time to put that symbol of rebellion and racism behind us and move toward healing and a better United States of America!
That’s why I signed a petition to The South Carolina State House, The South Carolina State Senate, and Governor Nikki Haley, which says:
“Symbols of hate and division have no place in our government. It’s time to stand up for what’s right and take down the Confederate flag!”
Will you sign this petition? Click here:
http://petitions.moveon.org/sign/remove-the-confederate-3?source=s.em.cp&r_by=5350655
Thanks!